The Illusive Eddie Jones...

He is not an easy man to catch up with. In fact, I never did. However, Sonny Cay, that easy-going, one-of-a-kind, hero of

BAHAMA BREEZE 

(see Lilly's Book Club page for my review) 

agreed to share a few secrets with us that he personally knows about Eddie. Welcome, Sonny! I really appreciate you doing this. It isn't going to cause any problems for you, is it?

Well, the love of my life, Anna Fortune, once said, "Guilt is God's way of nudging us into life's guard rails so we can find our way back onto the right road." But I'm not feeling any guilt right now, so, let's go with it.

That sounds like a great way to stay out of trouble, anyway. How did you meet Eddie Jones in the first place?

Me? I always wanted to write a novel. But my English teacher suggested I peruse an alternative line of work: one that didn't involve pronouns, prepositions, or dangling participles ⎯ which at the time, I thought was a small organ attached to a frog’s intestines. Happens, I heard Eddie wrote a few books about how to write and even teaches at some well-known writers conferences. So, I made an appointment with him. And I'd have to say he's a pretty upfront guy.

I've heard that. You feel he helped you out with your novel, then?

He said, to be honest, he had to agree with my English teacher. But he was willing to work with me, which is how I got the other job.

Are you telling me even characters for novels are desperate for work these days?

You have no idea how competitive it is to get a gig during tough times. Writers aren't the easiest people to work for during good times, either. But have you looked at the unemployment numbers lately? Shameful what’s happened to the middle class. Only I’m not here to discuss our government’s economic policies, or how messed up our electoral process is: though I defiantly have some strong opinions on those issues. I thought we were here to talk about Edie Jones.

And we are. So. That's why you agreed to star in Bahama Breeze. Very interesting. Had you ever had any experience working with authors or screenwriters before?

No, but I figured it would be a great way to learn the business. Never pass up an opportunity to work with professionals, I always say. But honestly? Yeah, I needed the work. Not that I’ve made a dime off this project. But Eddie assures me the royalties will begin arriving any day. Of course, this is the same guy who earns his living by making up stuff, so I’m not holding my breath. Except when he’s hovering over my shoulder because, as it turns out, he has a really bad case of halitosis.

A little more information than we needed, there. But moving right along, when did you first discover he was going to cast you as a toilet paper salesman? Did you have any aversions to that, considering it was your debut performance?

Maybe he was looking for some common element everyone can relate to, I don't know. He doesn't tell me everything. But like I said to Anna (she's the pretty, smart one in the story, did I mention that, yet?) Hey, I got to hand it to Eddie for creating someone like her for a guy like me. She's way above my pay grade, if you know what I mean. Still, being a toilet paper salesman may not be as exciting as working for a government spy agency, like she does, but at least I’m good at what I do. Besides that, everybody needs my product. Right?

You do have a point there, Sonny, that's a different way of looking at things. 

Yeah, I'm good at that. It's the only way I could survive all the stuff Mr. Eddie Jones put me through.

Sort of ran you through a ringer, did he?

You can say that, again. Eddie Jones, like the Author of Life, put me in tough circumstances. Said it would create tension in the story and force me to mature. Well, about three quarters of the way into the book, I had a heart-to-heart with ol' Eddie, and asked if he could back off on the trials. But he just said...

Goodness, we've run out of time, already. Especially if we want to leave a bit to read the review. Will you come back tomorrow, Sonny? We haven't even talked about Eddie Jones' real secrets, yet.

That's just what I was leading up to. But I guess I could save it for tomorrow.

Wonderful. Tomorrow for part two of "The Illusive Eddie Jones," then. I should think we have enough time to chat a bit about boats, though.

Off the record?

But of course...